“ … and this is my solemn vow”

  Marriage Liturgy 2006

Today’s celebrations are linked  by one of those words I have just read from the Scottish Marriage Liturgy. The link is the word ‘Vow’ and the action it implies.

Today, A and G will affirm the vows they made to each other at their wedding 20 years ago. Yesterday the King vowed to serve his people as sovereign for the rest of his life. Vows and the making of vows are important.

A vow is something most of us will make of our own accord and of our own free will; vows of commitment to a loved one; or to the service of God in Baptism and Ordination or like Charles to the Commonwealth as head of state. We choose to make these vows, we don’t have to do so. Charles could have refused the throne (it has happened before), A and G did not have to marry and pledge themselves to each other; I did not have to make vows at my ordination; we all chose to do so and it is that choosing that makes them special.

If we do not have to make a vow, why do we do so? From my own experience I think the answer has something to do with commitment. By making a vow and especially a vow in the sight of God, one is pledging to do one’s best  be it as priest, monarch or spouse in the rôle to which one feels called. It is never easy living up to the commitment one may have pledged oneself to, but the fact that one has vowed to try to do so can be an encouragement. It sort of acts as a check and balance, a touchstone helping one to keep on an even path and to carry on when things get tough.

There have been times as a priest when I have felt like chucking it all in; any married couple will have gone though similar times and the King will no doubt wonder quite what he said yes to as well. It is those vows we make that help us to go on and they can also help us to recognise when we need to end something as well. For a vow should be something that is life affirming to ourselves just as it might be affirming to others to whom the vow is made. Monarch’s may abdicate if they feel the rôle has become too much for them to exercise effectively; marriages may end if the relationship is no longer viable and priests retire from paid posts and responsibilities (some never to function as a clergy person again).

When we make a vow we do so with the intention that it will be for life or for as long as it is deemed to be right and good to try and live up to that vow. When we end a vow be it by death, abdication, divorce or retirement or whatever it does not mean that we have failed but that we have recognised that then original vow no longer holds true to what we felt called to or to be.

This Sunday, however, we are celebrating vows made recently and in the past and praying for their renewal and furtherance over the years to come. I hope when you lift a glass after this service that you’ll raise a toast to all who have made vows for whatever reason, that God will  bless them and keep them always.